The 3 Minute Game
Another fun game to get used to consent and boundaries is to play the 3 minute game. Ask to do something with your partner; ie. Can I give you a shoulder massage. Partner to feel into their body and answer from that place, if it feels like a yes, then go ahead. However if the boundary or sensation is telling them that they are not comfortable with that, then simply say NO can you choose something else. Once an agreement is reached, put a timer on for 3 minutes. If it’s a shoulder massage that’s been offered, then it’s just the shoulders, you don’t go up the neck or down the back or arms…it’s just the shoulders. That is what you asked for. This keeps it in consent and within agreed boundaries.
You can then extend that into more of a sexual component if you are both in consent and in agreement to explore in that way…
No-one Should Ever Experience Consent in the Shadow
The more conscious and present we become the easier it is to connect from a place of authenticity. Sexual crimes of any nature is a crime against life. Perpetrators have mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters and children so it’s incredibly hard to fathom how this happens. However one thing we know for sure is that it’s been happening since the beginning of time. That doesn’t make it right, that does not justify it to continue to happen.
The #metoo campaign has started to lift the lid on a worldwide capacity and women are saying NO MORE. Enough is enough! The Dalai Lama said something along the lines of “It will be the western women who will change the world”…change is coming – How does it get better than that!
We can’t change the past however it’s how we move forward into the future, that makes the difference.